Today was not the best day for the Melancholy Swan. There was no class last night because the Academy is on Spring Break and I won't be in class next week because I'll be at a conference in Grand Rapids. I'm trying to be disciplined and practice by myself, but the NYC Ballet workout just doesn't inspire the same feelings. In class I feel light. If I avoid the mirror, there are moments where I forget to hate the way my body looks and rejoice the feeling of weightlessness that comes from walking on demi-point, of hopping and spinning on the studio floors. I can dance through the rest of the week just from one Thursday night class in a state of grace.
Without it, the Melancholy Swan feels the pull of gravity. Hurtful words and rude people pull me down even further and it becomes ever harder to rise up to my toes and the grace slowly ebbs from my life.
Which is why I am looking toward the future. The semester will be over in a month and I want to take as many ballet classes as I can during the summer. The Academy classes are short sessions (5-6 weeks) and I am looking at the local community college and park district for more. The community college is taught in a Russian tradition and is said to be very disciplined, but they are only offering Intermediate Ballet during the summer (MW from 7:00 - 9:45pm), and I'm not sure I'm ready. The park district offers adult ballet courses but their summer schedule isn't up yet.
Hopefully more classes and more dancing will make the grace last a little longer.